Johnson VE, Nadal KL, Sissoko DRG, King R. Institutional betrayal and gaslighting: Why whistle-blowers are so traumatized. Call me crazy: The subtle power of gaslighting. End the relationship: While it can be difficult, ending the relationship with someone who repeatedly gaslights you is often the most effective way to end the abuse.īreines J.Having another person's perspective can help make the situation clearer to you. Get an outside perspective: Talk to a friend or family member about what you are going through.Make it clear that you won't allow the other person to engage in actions such as trivializing or denying what you have to say. Set boundaries: Boundaries tell others what you are willing to accept in a relationship.Keep a journal, save text conversations, or keep emails so that you can look back on them later and remind yourself that you shouldn't doubt or question yourself. Save the evidence: Because gaslighting can make you question yourself, work on preserving evidence of your experiences.Physically leaving the situation can help, but you might also try using some relaxation techniques such ad deep breathing or grounding exercises. Gain some distance: It can be helpful to take a step back from the intense emotions that gaslighting can evoke.You struggle to make decisions because you distrust yourself: You would rather allow your partner, friend, or family member to make decisions for you and avoid decision-making altogether.In other words, you worry that you are not well mentally. You wonder what's wrong with you: You wonder if there’s something fundamentally wrong with you.You assume others are disappointed in you: You apologize all the time for what you do or who you are, assuming people are let down by you or that you have somehow made a mistake.You second-guess yourself: You frequently wonder if you accurately remember the details of past events. You may have even stopped trying to share what you remember for fear that it is wrong.You feel inadequate: You feel like you are never 'good enough.' You try to live up to the expectations and demands of others, even if they are unreasonable.You spend a lot of time apologizing: You feel the need to apologize all the time for what you do or who you are.You have a sense of impending doom: You feel like something terrible is about to happen when you are around this person. This may include feeling threatened and on edge without knowing why.You worry that you are too sensitive: The person minimizes hurtful behaviors or words by saying “I was just joking' or 'you need thicker skin.'.You feel confused: The behavior of the person gaslighting you confuses you, almost as if they are Dr.You are disappointed in yourself and who you have become: For instance, you feel like you are weak and passive, and that you used to be stronger and more assertive.Sometimes, you even find yourself repeating these statements to yourself. You wonder if you are what they say you are: The person who gaslights you says words make you feel like you are wrong, unintelligent, inadequate, or insane.This makes you feel trapped and isolated. You feel alone and powerless: You are convinced that everyone around you thinks you are 'strange,' 'crazy,' or 'unstable,' just like the person who is gaslighting you says you are.You also feel on edge and lack self-esteem. You feel vulnerable and insecure: You often feel like you 'walk on eggshells' around your partner, friend, or family member.You question your judgment and perceptions: You are afraid of speaking up or expressing your emotions. You have learned that sharing your opinion usually makes you feel worse in the end, so you stay silent instead.You doubt your feelings and reality: You try to convince yourself that the treatment you receive is not that bad or that you are too sensitive.

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